Saturday, August 10, 2013

Remembering SJ's Beginnings

Today my pregnancy calendar nears the end of month 9.  It's day 241 of this roller coaster of a pregnancy with our beloved fourth son, Shane Gerald (SJ) Simmons.  I am 34 wks., 3 days pregnant today, and I can't buckle my own sandals.  :)   Abbie laughs often when I ask for help, mimicking the mom on 'My Big Fat Greek Wedding' and says, 'Good thing you have ME to tie your SHOES!' in her most convincing Greek accent.

After a challenging night in the sleep dept., I awakened choosing gratitude for the jabs in my ribs/hips/pelvic bones, as well as the gastrointestinal disturbances that added to all of the OTHER reasons why sleep is evolving into the phase of preparation God designed, so I won't be freaked out when the erratic sleep cycles of 'babymooning' are upon me.  Regardless of how committed I'm learning to become, about nocturnal health, this is my generous Heavenly Father's way of gradually transitioning me to a place where 'laying down my life' for this new baby is less shocking than it would be if I slept perfectly before the birth.

While drafting an email to friends after rolling my awkward body out of bed today, I stumbled upon an email I penned on the day I learned that I was carrying SJ.  I share it below as a mile marker in our family history, and to remind myself that God is with us.  This is HIS GIG we do around here, doing all we know to do to equip our large number of offspring for the King's purposes. 

I sent it midday on Sat. AM, January 12, 2013 (we think this little man was conceived on Christmas Day), recruiting intercession and a band of cheerleaders to be the loving 'one anothers' the New Testament talks about.  I copied a text dialogue I'd been in earlier that morning as I sat with my mouth wide open, staring at 2 pink lines on a home pregnancy test and feeling VERY surprised, even a little weak, in the faith dept. 

See the following text dialogue between me and my precious, life-giving friend Michelle Patterson early this morning, as I sat in the bathroom with all my peeps asleep, trying to get my arms around some big news that was NOT in my planner (considering how hyper organized I am about my fertility monitor and commitment to 'stewardship' over my challenged 'earth suit'/physical body, post cancer):
'Chace:  Michelle, I'm expecting.  Due Sept 18.  Grateful to God for the estrogen surge;  processing how this changes our logistics and thoughts for the coming year slightly.  All I know is that He's decided this is best.  If He chose this for me, and His ways are higher than my pitiful (at times, wimpy-whiny-baby-brat) ways and thoughts, then I rejoice and feel happy that Annemarie is not the caboose, like we'd thought.  Love you.  
Michelle:  Wow wow wow! Another Simmons bringing the Kingdom to earth!!! Hallelujah!! So you are feeling good?
Chace:  THANK YOU FOR CELEBRATING WITH ME!  No one's up here yet, and of course the enemy wants to straddle me with mixed emotions, which is crazy, bc the bottom line is Kingdom (thanks, Michelle, for that simple-duh!-reminder I couldn't grasp at on my own, as I sit here in shock).
Michelle:  You mean you just found out?!?
Chace:  5 min before I texted you.  How cool that I felt safe texting you so early.  Wasn't sure who to tell.  You never know how many 'Kingdom' people will be tacky, when I'm legitimately in need of strength from Christ's body, in order to face this 'not necessarily about life' planet we live on with the news of my 10th child's conception.   I have a normal amount of humanity/humble concern about how I don't feel equipped AT ALL for this ginormous task/work load Jesus believes I can handle, no problem, with His Spirit steering my ship.
Michelle:  Wow, what an honor for me to know! Thank you for telling me! Now make no mistake, I have been stomping around this kitchen interceding for your overwhelmedness, that's a given!! What I am hearing Him say is that He LOVES YOU CHACE!!! And that He will never be motivated by any other force towards you but love. Even if we can't figure it...we will see that it is love! I will now go continue stomping for you!:):)
Chace:  Stomping is true community.
Michelle:  Fo sho
Chace:  Crying happy tears about His Love (and the honor of your friendship and stompfest).  Consecrated to Ellie Holcomb Pandora last night and it played Jenn Johnson's 'Come to Me,' which I've heard and loved a thousand times, but I was sitting on the kitchen floor sorting random bits and pieces of a bucket of things that needed to be put away (before I could face a Biblically sound version of Sabbath obediently, without having more work to face than I could emotionally bear on Sun. afternoon) after having been crying for an hour over getting the wind knocked out of me by one heavy child-training event after another all day, all week, all month :) .... and I LIFTED MY HANDS WHILE I SAT INDIAN STYLE, not knowing I had my 10th child in my womb, and just bawled tears of confidence in HIM...and then I started laughing at how hilarious it all really is.  My 'bon bon eating, gravy, one of two children, being redeeemed from a history of raging feminism, on-my way-to-law-school-for-Jesus resume, attempting to pull this craziness off for the glory of God.  The reporter that was at our house interviewing us and taking photos for the Waxahachie Now magazine yesterday will have an interesting twist on the story she titled 'Old School' for sure now.  :)
Michelle:  Wow!!! He is so amazing! And apparently absolutely capable of doing whatever He wants!! Wahoo! Of the increase of His government AND His peace, there shall be no end!!! Kiss kiss hug hug!! Dancey twirls!!'
So, friends, please pray...pray for that peace and confidence in our great God.  I've been reading a children's biography about Amy Carmichael, 'With Daring Faith,' and for the first time, I saw a connection between her battle with serious health challenges and mine.  The Lord's faithfulness to resource her with all of the things she needed to fulfill the motherhood mandate on her life enabled her to fulfill her vision/MY VISION, the KINGDOM EXPANSION plan.  He changed the world through her jacked up physical body, in spite of her discomforts, and I'm convinced today, in my spirit, that He's in the process of doing a very similar thing through me, for His glory."

1 comment:

  1. Hi! This is Sarah Shoop. Tonight y'alls family was on my heart. I wanted to contact you but I didn't think I had y'alls email address anymore. But I dug through emails way back and found the link to Emma's blog. From there I clicked the link to this blog. Wow. What a surprise and joy to read this post! I can't help but smile when I think of the y'alls family, despite the years it has been since we've seen each other. I still have an email address of y'alls that I am not sure if it's still being used. I'd really love to reconnect again soon! Please email me at whenever y'all get the chance! I understand with baby 10 you all are very busy. Much love to your special family! Many blessings on each of you!